Christian Life

Today I begin a series of addresses from the Bible which I hope will be a practical exploration of those challenges we may all have to face at some point in our lives.

From time to time throughout my preaching ministry, I have chosen ‘pastoral themes’ and found they have initiated conversations and enabled people to talk about matters often outside the realm of usual discussion.  If that were to occur, it would seem a worthy outcome and a meaningful contribution to sharing in God’s work in our lives.

There is an overall title for this series which is a painful question: “Doesn’t Anyone Care?”  There are times in life’s journey when that’s exactly how we feel about our situation or a predicament in which we find ourselves caught.  I begin from the assumption I shall return to again and again – that God meets us through his grace in our place of need.

I remember reading of a little girl who was dying of leukemia.  She asked her nurse for a crying doll.  The nurse was more than a little puzzled and asked, “Why do you want a doll that can cry?”  Her reply was full of insight into human nature: “Because Mummy and I both need to cry and Mummy won’t cry in front of me, and I can’t cry if Mummy doesn’t.  If we had a crying doll, all three of us could cry together.  I know we would feel better then!” 

It is important, at appropriate times, to cry.  Tears can be a great healer, if they enable us to gain release and, in turn, we allow the Lord to speak to us at our point of need.  

I share with you two very significant verses from Psalm 126:  “Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.  He who goes out weeping, carrying seed to sow, will return with songs of joy, carrying sheaves with him.” (Psalm 126: 5-6)

Psalm 126 speaks of life from the perspective of a person who is living at a very unhappy time in his people’s history.  Israel has become as barren of life and hope as the beds of the empty rivers.

Artur Weiser suggests that we should read this psalm in association with the autumnal feast as a “community’s expectation of salvation in times of adversity.”  He admits to the psalm being homely and yet having profound piety.  His description is of the psalm being “like a precious stone in a simple and yet worthy setting.”

Such is the context of the life of faith, experiencing the revelation of God in the dry and arid places which are parched, spiritually drought-scourged and desert-like.  Only God can bring about such unqualified joy such as ends this psalm.  But it is the aridity and barrenness which the psalm suggests are life’s experience for those people in what has often been referred to as a psalm of ‘national lament’.

There is no doubt whatsoever that there are periods in our lives when that’s just how we feel, but the Psalmist is wise enough not merely to put into words the despair of his people, but also points to a time when the tears of the present will make way for the joy of the future.  Some people have described this psalm as one of the most beautiful in the whole of the Book of Psalms.  It is only six verses long, but it journeys through all the various aspects of life – laughter and tears, sorrow and joy, dejection and exultation, spring and autumn, dreams and cruel reality – but the main theme is that sorrow can give way to joy.

When the psalmist speaks about sowing in tears and reaping in joy, you can see how this would relate to the relentless heat of summer and the thirsty ground south of Jerusalem.  Here in Australia, it was wonderful to see the rain earlier in the year bring hope and confidence to our farmers once again, especially in those places that had received no rain for years.

Let me say a number of things about this psalm and then suggest some pointers for our application of the theme – ‘tears paving the way for healing’ in our lives.

The Psalms are the background of the worship of the people of God in the Old Testament and have been the inspiration of the Christian community down the centuries. 

They are divided into five books and are still powerful, insightful and meaningful for our study today.  I am particularly impressed by the Psalms’ ability:

• to cover such a wide range of subject material – both personal and corporate.
  
• to handle themes with the deep sincerity of the psalmists.
  
• to reveal the profound humanity of the psalmists.

Tertullian noted that by the second century the Psalms had become part of the Christian pattern of worship ‘in all parts of the world’.  The Hebrew Psalms hold up a mirror to human experience and allow us to engage with what we find with frankness and faith.

Elmer A Leslie describes Psalm 126 as ‘a fervent New Year prayer that God will turn the fortunes of His people’.  At the dawn of any new year there are awoken hopes and confidence that God would reveal a whole new way of dealing with his people. 

The psalm opens with a look back at the past (v.v. 1-3).  God had answered prayer time and again and the situation had changed for the good.  God had filled the thirsty water beds before and so they cry out (v.4).  Then comes our text (v.5) and the psalmist closes with his picture of high assurance and confidence (v.6).
Text:  Psalm 126, verse 5 –

“Those who sow in tears will reap with songs of joy.”

Tears need not be a sign of weakness, but can indicate strength 

We are prone to see tears in a negative way, but this need not be so.  Tears can be equally powerful in testifying to love and joy.  Whilst it is true that love is always vulnerable and carries the risk of being hurt, tears open up the opportunity to find new life and new depth.

In the Easter narrative, we read how early on Sunday morning, while it was still dark, a woman stood in the garden, outside the tomb of Jesus, with tears streaming down her face and misting her eyes.  Mary wept because, as she says, “They have taken away my Lord and I don’t know where they have put him.” (John 20:13)  Her tears were also for a whole host of other reasons:

• She had lost someone she loved dearly.
  
• She thought she would never see him again.
  
• She would have her regrets.
  
• She experienced something of the futility of life.

But her tears will give way to hope and new life, as Jesus simply says her name, “Mary.”

The psalmist knew all too well what it was like to sow in barren times and this he associates with sowing in tears.  These tears would give way to greater hope.  Although tears can sometimes be an embarrassment to others, they reveal depth of feeling, which I take as a sign of strength. 

There is a lovely story of a boy who was watching his mother peeling onions.  He said, “Those onions are strong, Mum.  I can smell them with my eyes.”  Strong people smell with their eyes and with their hearts.

In Canaanite thought, sowing was often associated with the dying and burial of nature.  So lamentation and weeping were not thought inappropriate with the scattering of seed, in the hope of securing a plentiful harvest.  As A A Anderson points out, “This does not mean that the Hebrews subscribed to those beliefs” – but it might explain the ease in which the imagery is used.  Tears can be an indication of inner-vigour to face up to life’s challenges.

Charles Haddon Spurgeon contended, “The Lord gets his best soldiers out of the heights of affliction.”  Isn’t one of the most descriptive parts of Isaiah’s wonderful Servant Song so immediately recognisable as Jesus Christ as the Servant is described as “a man of sorrows, and familiar with suffering” (Isaiah 53:3)?

Edwin Hubbell Chapin, author and social reformer, wrote, “Out of suffering have emerged the strongest souls; the most massive characters are seamed with scars; martyrs have put on their coronation robes glittering with fire, and through their tears have the sorrowful first seen the gates of heaven.”

Tears are most often a sign of love and indicate the loss we feel at some personal level of our lives.  They must not be viewed as a useless accessory that can be ignored.  Tears may be a sign of grief which could be described as one of the few things which lead us to change our way of living and relating to the world and those around us in an entirely different way.  I wouldn’t call that weakness!

Tears can alert us to issues which require our attention 

Try to collate in your mind a list of the occasions when you have seen the purpose of tears.  They can be listed under a wide range of categories – anger, fear, guilt, helplessness, physical exhaustion or general depression about life.  We acknowledge the place of tears in loss or bereavement, but they emerge at other times, too.

Tears are an indicator of something which requires our attention.  Issues that are not dealt with can result in far more serious consequences such as bitterness and cruelty.  Is this what Henry Maudsley meant when he said, “The sorrow which has no vent in tears may make other organs weep.”?

The unattended hurts of life can cause the greatest harm not only to an individual, but also to all with whom they come into contact.  Teaching boys that they must not cry was one of the great errors of a former generation – its damage is still observable today.

One of the reasons why men find grief and loss so difficult to handle is the cultural messages that have been internalised over the years:

• In the playground, the small boy cuts his leg and he’s greeted with the words, “Now then, big boys don’t cry.”
  
• On the football field, a crunching tackle brings tears to the eyes and a mate is heard to shout, “Keep moving - take it like a man!”

William Shakespeare wrote for King Henry VI: “To weep is to make less the depth of grief.”

The message seems to be that to express deep pain is to be less than a man.  The wounds of loss, tragedy, failure and death do not bypass men.  Tears may be necessary to help us to attend to the deep parts of life.

It is certainly true that tears do need to be controlled sometimes.  In the opening story of the little girl who wanted a ‘crying doll’, she was looking for an appropriate time for her tears to be shed.  One writer described tears as ‘an inner storehouse’.  As with any storehouse, they can build up over a period of time, so much so that they reach a point when they need to be set free from their locked and restrictive confinement.  If we are to live life in a wholesome way, then there would be an appropriate place for tears.

• Never using tears – they must not be used to put pressure upon others or to get our own way.  If our lives are understood within the orbit of love, then we will refrain from ever using tears as a weapon.
  
• Always seeking to interpret our pain – whilst we may not understand all the pain we undergo in our lives, if we seek to abide in Jesus Christ our tears will at least be a warning of some part of our life which needs attention or offering back to God.
  
• The beginning of healing – healing or God’s wholeness is brought about as we offer our pain and know that God does care for us in the midst of whatever it is we face in sorrow, pain, hurt or rejection.

F B Meyer, the Bible expositor, in writing his book on Abraham, said, “Scripture never condemns grief.  Tears are valuable.  They are God-given relief mechanisms!”  He went on, “There are some who chide tears as unmanly, unsubmissive, unchristian.  They would comfort us with a chill and pious stoicism, bidding us meet the most agitating passages in our history with rigid and tearless countenance … Tears relieve the burning brain, as a shower the electric clouds.  Tears discharge the unsupportable agony of the heart, as an overflow lessens the pressure of the flood against the dam.  Tears are the material out of which heaven weaves the brightest rainbow.”

Tears wash clean the lens by which we look out on life 

Just as the psalmist points to the fact that he sees sowing in tears making way for reaping and returning with joy, God would help us to have a positive take upon tears in our lives.  Whilst sorrow and hurt can produce all kinds of negative reactions in our lives – namely rebellion, bitterness, withdrawal and so on – tears can help us move on in our present experience.

The danger of unrecognised grief is that it can lead to the most unhelpful and inappropriate responses – for example a man or woman can lose their job or their marriage may fall apart and they turn to drink, believing that this is some kind of way of handling the situation.

I recall the true story of a man who lost his wife in tragic circumstances and the next day he went out and bought a car.  It was hard for anyone close to him to understand what was going on – and I am not sure that anyone ever said anything about it.  However, what was happening was not a lack of respect for the person who had died, but an inappropriate way of trying to move on.  This ‘lone ranger’ way of living is far from healthy.

I believe the fact that Jesus wept at receiving the news of Lazarus’ death and the grief it caused Martha and Mary is an indication of the positive doorway of tears.  There is nothing to be gained in approaching grief, pain, loss or hurt by pretending whatever has happened hasn’t really happened!  This is the kind of attitude which is encouraged by those who call for folks to ‘put on a brave face’.  Such an attitude helps no-one!

• It is positive to be honest before God.  This not only helpful, but gives us insight into the God we worship and upon whom we believe.  He doesn’t expect any pretence on our part.  It is no help to keep rehearsing the question ‘Why?’
  
• It is positive to be honest with ourselves.  Once we are able to say ‘Yes – I am hurting’ then we are giving people around us the opportunity to help us – as well as moving on in our own journey of healing.
  
• It is positive to be honest with each other.  Friends and family need to acknowledge the reality of the situation being faced.  I can give examples of how those in pain hid it even from those they love.

When Joseph Scriven wrote the words of the hymn “What a Friend we have in Jesus”, he pointed to the fact that everything can be taken to God – including regret, pain, isolation and even anger.

O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer.

The New Year Feast of Tabernacles would include prayer for rain in the coming days, so that there might be a harvest of what had been sowed.  If the context of this psalm was a time of misfortune (v.4) expressed in terms of famine and thirst, then the joy would be even greater at harvest time.  How true it is that every crisis, calamity and apparent disaster can be transformed into something more by the grace of God!

Tears are important for healing.  At times of deepest hurt in people’s lives, they have to make arrangements and people too often expect them to act normally, when in point of fact they have hit a wall!  The Jewish proverb is enlightening:  “What soap is to the body, tears are to the soul.”
 
The sentiments of this psalm were the inspiration of Knowles Shaw’s well known gospel song “Bringing in the Sheaves”, but it has a much deeper meaning – if ‘seedtime’ is the toil and anxiety of life, then ‘harvest’ will more than make up for the sorrow of life as we see God’s bigger picture!  The desire of the psalm is that all of the exiles would return, as W T Purkiser described it, “Like the full flash floods of the rainy season.”

Bob Miller wrote a helpful ‘Care’ leaflet about how important it is for men to handle grief and he refers to one person’s experience:  "'After I lost my job,’ said Fred, ‘it was six months of living hell.  I have never felt so lost or depressed.  I was surprised by how hard it hit me, just sitting there in the house when other men were going to work.  Thank God for my wife, and how she supported me. 

‘Thank God, also, for the other people in my life who reached out and lent a hand, an ear, a shoulder, a bit of advice.  Through this experience, I’ve learned that I am more than my job, and that life is about a lot more than work.  It’s about being there for the people closest to us, and letting them be there for us, too.’”

Sowing and reaping, tears and laughter, are very closely located in this life.  The greatest prizes in life are not obtained without tears.  Psalm 126 leads us to understand one of the greatest truths of all – and I conclude with an interesting cross reference in Psalm 30:  “… weeping may remain for a night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” (Psalm 30:5)