Lifeforce Memorial Wall

I lost my cousin a year ago on sunday. Craig was the most soft hearted, caring and loving person who would give you anything that you asked for, he would always be there if you needed anything Not a day goes by that we don't think of him . Craig we are all proud of you and what you achieved. The time we shared was precious and we miss you. I know you are alright now but your life was taken too short you will always be in my heart. I want to put my arms around you and hug you. May the road rise up to meet you may the wind always be at your back and may god hold you in the palm of his hands until we meet again. Love Anita, Tim, Aunty Jan.

Posted by anita hanley from camden on Thursday, November 05, 2009 19:41

Craig Manusu April 9, 1968 - November 8, 2008

My Darling Brother Craig,

Its been almost a year since that fateful night when I received the phonecall that will forever change my life in ways that words cannot express. It was my mother on the phone screaming that my brother had committed suicide. That memory will never go away...Its something my mind couldn't comprehend and it still can't. How did it happen....I have learnt in life no matter how much you try, there are just some things you cannot control.

Craig, you were such a special person in many ways. Even though I lived half a world away from you, you were always the first person I wanted to see when I visited home every year. You and I were always as much friends as we were brother and sister. We were always laughing and joking when we were together but we also knew we had each other to rely on in a jam, that was always such a comfort to me. I still can't believe you arent here anymore. I can't tell you how much both Mum and I miss you.... you were really a wonderful caring guy and I know that everyone you came in contact with knew this about you.

Until we meet again, please keep near and know that not a day goes by that my heart doesn't hurt for you, I love you, your big sister.... Cheryl

Posted by Cheryl Manusu (Clements) from New Jersey USA on Sunday, October 25, 2009 04:47

I lost my brother Andrew to suicide on the 22/7/2008. I find it so hard to cope daily knowing that you have chosen death over life. Why. I have no answers. I have no idea of why you did this.I struggle daily and often find myself out of breath when my thoughts turn to you. Why. Why. Why didnt you come to me.I think about you, Andrew every day and there will always be a hole in my heart and someone missing from my life forever.
You were a good person, you had amazing talents.
We all miss you and wish you were here.
Love you big sis!!

Posted by Rachel from Newcastle on Saturday, October 24, 2009 09:38

A flower lent not given
to bud on earth
and bloom in heaven.

In loving memory of my little brother BJ HUDSON who passed away on saturday 7th march 2009 aged 25years.
I miss you so so much bj,
rest in peace my beautiful brother.

TO BE JUDGED BY NO-ONE

LOVING YOU FOREVER
rach
xoxoxoxxo

Posted by Rachel Charnock from Branxton NSW on Friday, October 23, 2009 13:43

Happy 35th Birthday Darren........we love you heaps and miss you more.
Yesterday Dillon and I got to talk about you at the Sunflower Day in Newcastle, well I got to talk while Dillon stood beside me holding your photo, we were all so proud of him..........as we know you are also very proud of him, we know you watch over him from Heaven.
It was a great day yesterday and we are starting to make new friends all in the same boat as us, it is becoming like a family reunion...........
Many thanks to Wesley Mission Lifeforce for helping us all to keep our loved ones ''alive'' and giving us such a beautiful service to hold in our hearts and memories forever......
We love you and miss you so much Darren we hope you have a great birthday party in Heaven with your Angel friends......35 Angel kisses for you sweetheart.........
Love Mum, Dad, Dillon, Kylie,Debbie, Nicole, Scott, Lauren and all your nieces and nephews you never got to meet. xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Posted by Faye Hawley from Newcastle on Friday, October 23, 2009 11:09

To My dearest Andrew
I am glad you thought our 8 years together were your best years. I am glad we shared so many laughs. I am glad I learnt so much from you even though I was older. I am glad your beautiful mind is now forever at peace and that perhaps your preciouse soul is seeking a new abode. I thank you for the thought waves you have so many times shared since XMAS Day 2008. I miss you so very much as you know and the simple lifestyle that we shared but I move forward every day also because of what we had. Watch over Buddy and I as you say you will. He's turning into a great dog and a good companion thanks to your early training. I am happy you left me with more fond memories then dark ones dear man and that we both realised what real love is. I am glad I told you every now and then how much you meant to me and how much you showed me this in return. Safe travels dear soul until we meet again. :-) Forever Mary xxx

Posted by Mary Dreger from Sydney on Wednesday, October 21, 2009 12:48

To those reading my message,
So many times I go write my message here but I'm not able to finish it.....so backspace I go.
I am so lonely and miss my husband whom committed suicide 7months 1 week and 6 days ago (3/3/09).
No words seem to say the emotions I feel I guess the best way to say it is its like a roller coaster that you just never seem to come off or slow down on.
My husband left me 5 beautiful kids who are all in their own special way just like him... they too miss him sooo much. Not a day goes by where when doing the usual motherly thing around the house I don't come across a letter or note with those same words RIP Daddy or I miss you so much Daddy. Our hearts are just so lonely and our house is so cold these days. I hate the lonelyness.. I just wish we can turn the hands of time back, I know everyone says we cant but its now the only wish I will ever have.
I miss you Jimi and so sorry for not coming back earlier. I will forever hold you in my heart and never ever will anyone take that place.
Love you Jimi forever and ever.
Miss you so so much.
xoxoxooxoxoxooxoxoxooxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox oxoxoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoooooxooxoxo oxxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox oxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxox

Posted by Amanda Welch from Kurri Kurri on Friday, October 16, 2009 22:13

In loving memory of my two brothers who took their own lives. Doug in 1992 aged 36 and Greg in 2009 aged 54.The pain runs long and deep. Always remembered, forever loved.
''Stay a while with your own ones''

Posted by Ruth from Sydney on Tuesday, October 13, 2009 10:58

love you brenden forever mum dad and tickford your funny dog GO FORD 11TH OCTOBER 09

Posted by carol wilcox from sydney on Sunday, October 11, 2009 08:41

My darling husband Greg departed this world by his own hand on 28th August 2007. It's two years now and I still feel his spirit with me every day. A beautiful man with a beautiful heart and a mental illness that wouldn't give him any peace. Now thankfully, he is at peace. Missing you always, love Marilyn

Posted by Marilyn Lema from Penrith on Thursday, October 08, 2009 22:44

To my Best Mate,My Son,My Chado. The day you left I can never forget you were my pride and joy . You were too young to leave like that.We wanted to have our first xmas with U and your girl Lily but it wasnt meant to be.Your little bro,s miss you so much that U already know.Your daughter Lily will never forget who you are.She tells me YOU ARE HER DAD IN THE SKY.You were only 23and she was 2 .Your never far away in my thoughts. We LUV YOU CHAD JOHN MORRIS.Your mum Carol,Dad Lack,Bro,s JamesandDylan,also your preciuos gift.Miss Lily.They say it takes a minute to find a special person,an hour to appreciate them,a day to love them,but then an entire life to forget them.Chad hung himself on the 30-9-2005 due to depression since his death I now suffer anxiety attacks I have a great support network and Ive recently did a mental health first aid course so I can maybe help others from going through a night mare like the 1 suicide has on familyandFreinds left to struggle threw

Posted by Carol Morris from N.S.W. Sydney on Wednesday, October 07, 2009 10:37

Our beautiful Felicity, daughter, sister, mother, wife and aunt.
Not a second of everyday goes by that we do not think of you and miss you.
You had everything to live for and nothing to die for, I wish I understood.
Forever in our hearts and love is forever.

Love Mum oxoxox

Posted by ROSALYN RIDGEWELL from sydney on Tuesday, October 06, 2009 14:24

We lost James to suicide on July 2nd 2008, at 26 years old. I never knew what strength was before this.
Not a day goes by that i am not reminded of you. I will always wonder and question what else could have been done.
I wish that people would not be afraid to ask about you and who you were. Your story is as much a part of me as it is a part of you. Suicide is not something to be hidden. If we continue to ignore it more lives will be lost and more families will be ruined. Talking about you helps me heal, it stirs good memories of you, instead of the nothingness that is here now.
love you always, wherever you are xxx

Posted by Hannah Goode from Sydney on Saturday, October 03, 2009 12:54

To Adam my cousin im sorry you were in the darkest moment that took you away from us all especially your mum, children and brothers we all loved you and miss you very much

love sandra x

Posted by sandra from currans hill on Friday, October 02, 2009 18:47

We had a lovely day at the Opera House we hope you seen your sunflowers from Heaven. Maybe you could have turned the sun down a bit to save us from sunburn and maybe you could have turned the wind off for a while, we thought the Memorial Wall was going to topple over a few times. Maybe the wind was from all you special Angels to let us know that you were there.
We miss you so much Darren but we know with each passing day we are a day closer to seeing you again.
Miss you our darling son.
Love you heaps
Love Always
Mum and Dad xoxox

Posted by Faye Hawley from Newcastle on Friday, October 02, 2009 09:50

To my beautiful Merle.
Love, mbz.

Posted by Maria from Sydney on Thursday, October 01, 2009 23:38

To my beloved father, Paul Michael O'Toole.

I think about you and what happened to you every single day of my life. It still distresses me that someone who loved life and experienced it so intensely could choose to end it. There was never anyone quite like you, and we all struggle with the loss. I forgive you.

I long to speak to you - to apologise or explain or understand something of the way you must have felt. Suicide leaves so many silences, so many words that could have been spoken. I still wish there was a moment that could have changed everything.

It has been almost three years. I will love you forever, and you are a part of me.

Posted by Kate O'Connor from Sydney on Tuesday, September 29, 2009 21:11

I lost my nephew, Craig Manusu, to suicide last year. Craig had a truly beautiful nature but in his blackest moment made a decision which took him away from those who loved him dearly, especially his mum, Patricia, and his sister, Cheryl. He was very smart and had a knack for being able to fix anything and do anything. He was very artistic and did some beautiful art works. He loved animals and had a very sensitive and kind nature. He was devoted to his mother as was she to him. He came from a very loving family. He had so much to live for but just could not see that in his darkest moments. Not a day goes by where we do not miss him and ask why. More counselling services need to be available to help people find alternatives to suicide. Love you Craig and miss you xxxxx

Posted by Fran Manusu from Prairiewood NSW on Thursday, September 24, 2009 11:13

Herbert George Russell (George)
12/5/1949 - 4/4/2001

My friend, my love, my husband
a wonderful Father, loving Grandfather

Too young to die
Too precious to loose
It was your will
We could not choose

Our love for you will never die
because we have such wonderful memories to keep you with us forever.

It has been so long without you but I still wake in the night and wisper your name and know that you are there with me.

Your pain has gone and you are at peace

Your loving and devoted wife
Susanne

Posted by Susanne Russell from Sydney Australia on Thursday, September 24, 2009 10:40

So this tribute goes out to you
In remembrance of your youth
Youve left us wondering, what it was you feared
Why did we not see your pain?
We trust you are at peace
With God and yourself

Hey teenager of the year
Help us all to understand
Hey teenager of the year
Your new life has just begun

And you wont suffer anymore
God has given you new plans
To teach us all to talk
To family and friends
To take the opportunity that is here
To help each other out
As best we can

Hey teenager of the year
Help us all to understand
Hey teenager of the year
Your new life has just begun

Your life on earth
It was worthwhile
You were a big part of our life
We will miss you day and night

Hey teenager of the year
Help us all to understand
Hey teenager of the year
Your new life begins right now
_______________________________________________________

In Memory of Bowen Michael James 12/01/84 -13/03/2000

_______________________________________________________

Posted by mum from MacMasters Beach on Wednesday, September 23, 2009 11:01

This message is for BradM:

Hi Brad I'm so sorry to hear about your ''Best Mate''. My heart goes out to you and everyone concerned.

I lost my boyfriend on the 3rd December 2008 to suicide, I am totally lost and feel that my life will never be the same again.

I don't think too many people really understand the after mark of a survivor to suicide only the people who are left behind.

If you ever need someone to talk to you can send me an email if you like Patricia.Clayton@iag.com.au:-)

Take care

Tricia

Posted by Patricia Clayton from Hornsby Sydney on Wednesday, September 23, 2009 10:43

Dearest James,
No longer the black days of lonely despair.
Your parents , family and friends have never stopped blaming themselves for not seeing the extent of your pain. We know you are smiling and serene now, but wish we had one last moment to hold you and say how much you are loved.
Forever in our hearts..............

Posted by Roz Hogan from Sydney on Tuesday, September 22, 2009 11:24

'The love inside, you take it with you.' We love you and miss you Katie.

Posted by D Richardson from Sydney on Friday, September 18, 2009 07:21

My best mate Simon past away just over 8 months ago and left the biggest hole in the lives with everyone who knew him! He was a gentleman, husband, son, Proud Australian and my closest of friends! All the trials we went through, hospital, gaol, life and you let this take you!!!
I will keep my long ago promise and keep my eye on your mum for you mate! I love you my brother and miss you deeply! See you on the other side my brother but not for a while!
Bradaz

Posted by BradM from Sydney, Australia on Thursday, September 17, 2009 10:08

Katie i'ts been 7 months since you left me in the still of the night when i never got to say good bye or kiss you for the last time and say good night and god bless, i miss you so much the smile on your face the feel of your touch, my heart aches and brakes each day that goes bye, but i know one day i'll see you again, your in my dreams thoughts and every thing i do, missing you heaps what else can i do it's so hard here not having you I love you my baby girl
Love you for ever Mum xxxxxx

Posted by Rebecca from Penrith on Thursday, September 17, 2009 05:28

Darren Hawley 23/10/1974-13/9/2006
My beautiful first born child took his life at the age of 31. We all miss you so much, life will never be the same for us. Three years on, we never thought we would get this far, but we battle on every day. I remind myself that each day is not just another day without you but a day closer to seeing you again. You are locked away safe in our hearts, no one can hurt you now. We all love you Darren always have and always will.
Huggles and kisses for you
Love Always
Mum xoxox

Darren's Memorial Site

darren-hawley.memory-of.com

Posted by Faye Hawley from Newcastle NSW on Monday, September 14, 2009 15:41

In memory of Michael Gough DOB 08/08/1984 - Departure date 03/12/2008

My darling Michael I feel your presence with me all the time.

The day I received the call regarding your departure I was shattered and totally lost (and still am).

My love for you is ''FOREVER'' and nobody will ever take your place.

Thank you for being my best friend, lover, sole mate, protector and boy friend.

Love forever :-) Your Baby Girl

mwah mwah mwah mwah

Posted by Patricia Clayton from Castle Hill on Saturday, September 12, 2009 10:29

In memory of my Dad, Brian Robert Foy, aged 62 - 31st March 1946 - 6th May 2008

On Sunday, Father's Day it was 16 months since you left us. I'm still struggling to come to terms with not being able to see you ever again, but it brings a little comfort to me to know that you are now reunited with Mum, as I know how much you dearly loved and missed her. In time I hope that I will be able to think of you with a smile on my face with happy memories of you instead of crying all these tears.

''If I had a flower for every time I thought of you, I could walk in my garden forever''

I miss you Pa, loving you always and forever, your Daughter, Tig (Karen) xxx

Posted by Kaz Foy from Summer Hill, NSW, Australia on Friday, September 11, 2009 16:30

My precious Michael my heart is hurting so bad. Our heartstrings will be connected forever. Pleasant little memories of you are tuggin' at my heart, Keep me thinkin' of you now we're apart, and with every heart-tug, wishes sweet and true. Leave my heart's door open, and find their way to you, But I don't mind the tuggin' at my heart strings now, Because it's so very special when its done by you.

Love always

Baby girl
mwah mwah mwah:-)

Posted by Tricia from sydney on Friday, September 11, 2009 14:49

My dearest nephew Darren you were only 28.
No-one ever could imagine where you must have been on that day.
I had to identify you at the morgue.
I relive that sad memory many times.
Your mother has never been the same, she loved you so much and was so heart broken and saddened
to think!,why! what happened !what did mum,family and friends miss to not know what you were feeling.
Always remembered and loved.
Aunty Linda

Posted by Linda from Sydney on Friday, September 11, 2009 13:10

It is almost 14 months since I lost you Adam, my eldest, you were the one who taught me how to love as a Mother, my beautiful boy. Most times I do not believe you have gone. I do not know what took you that fateful day. There is not a day or even an hour I do not think of you and wish you back with your Hi Mum. You left behind 2 beautiful children and through them I can see you still. My life will never be the same; life without you is not the same. Your death is a burden I will carry, IF I could have known could I have done something. And through all the pain and grief I have such wonderful memories of you. I admired how you had such high standards and how you strived so hard to do the very best, your love of animals, the environment, you were such an inspirational shining light and you taught me so much. I now strive to be a much better person, like you to understand others and try not to judge; that is your legacy you have left me. I will think of you every day and love you forever.
Your Mum

Posted by Yvonne Harmer from Currans Hill NSW on Monday, September 07, 2009 20:28

20 months today brenden james wiclox you went awaya never to come back again we miss you dearly all our love mum and dad and tickford xxxxooo

Posted by carol wilcox from lethbridge park on Sunday, August 30, 2009 10:39

Hey Matt my darling Bro...its nearly ten years since you left us...still miss you sooo...but I know you are a star in the heavens and laugh with me when you can! Just wanted you to know Moo, the BFs and I spent the weekend in Bathurst with your beautiful 17 year old Thomas...he is getting sooo much like you its freaky but a pleasure all the same...he is a cuddle bunny just like you too...I have designed his first tatt (your name of course) and hope to be with him on his 18th when he gets it!
We hung out with the Woodhams on Sunday and Marcus has named his beautiful new baby after you! You will always be in our hearts and lives...love ya

Posted by Cathi Duff from Thirroul on Thursday, June 04, 2009 12:31

no one could get the nerve to tell us what really happened to you.
but in time and with age we figured it out.
i miss you cuz now all ive got is the stories and the memories,
we miss you.

Posted by kt from cc on Thursday, May 28, 2009 08:08

In memory of Trevor James Walls, 20/12/2008, aged 26.

I can only imagine the heartbreak you felt in making the decision to leave...
You left behind 2 amazing and beautiful little girls who loved their Daddy more than life itself.
You were the most loving, devoted father, you were the son any man would gladly call theirs, you were a brother, an uncle, a companion, a friend, you were YOU.

Although we were apart, know, you were never far from my heart; you were my husband, my friend.
You will never know how sorry I am that I was not there to take away your pain, to tell you that we loved you, that your life was not in vain.

Trev you live within our girls and to this I promise you, they will grow up always knowing of their fathers love and of the man I once knew.

Love now and for always,

Toni, Mikaela and Bridie Walls.

Posted by Toni Walls from Dubbo on Tuesday, April 14, 2009 13:15

MY SISTER MONICA BIRCH TOOK HER OWN LIFE ON THE 2nd OF NOVEMBER 1992 SHE WAS A VICTIM OF DOMESTIC VIOLENCE WE MISS HER AND LOVE HER ALWAYS AND SHE REMAINS FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS SPREAD YOUR WINGS AND FLY MONICA YOU ARE A FREE SPIRIT NOW GOD BLESS XX

Posted by PAULINE WHEELER from upholland on Thursday, April 09, 2009 17:54

This message is meant to be a bear hug for Cheryl Evans, of Orlando, Florida. Your post caught my eye because my beloved son would have celebrated his 24th birthday just one day before yours, on March 28, 2009. But on the evening of May 27, 2005, when he was barely 20, his ''psychache'' became so unbearable that he took his own life.
In the eerie, painful days following his death I cried for him, I yelled at him, I cursed him, I blackmailed him so he would come back for a couple of minutes, just to let me stroke his curly hair one more time before saying goodbye. It's been almost four years. I feel like I descended into hell, but came back with the help and consolation that only Our Lord Jesus Christ can give. I stopped looking for explanations, because they were killing me and my other two sons.
Cheryl, right now there's nothing I can say to ease your pain, your confusion, your anger, your anguish, all those new feelings that overwhelm you. I just want to tell you that I'm here, that you can e-mail me at pdelrio2@gmail.com.
Please try to find a support group for survivors of suicide in your area and, though you will probably find yourself hating God at some time or other, He is there with you, holding you in His loving arms just as He is holding your son and mine.
I am your friend, I am your fellow ''orphaned'' mother (for lack of a better term), I've been there and I'm more than willing to listen to you and offer a helping hand in these trying times. Don't hesitate to contact me.
The only thing I ask is that you try to understand that your child had a mental illness (most likely depression). This wasn't against you or anybody else. This was another lost struggle against cancer of the soul.
God bless you.
Paulina

Posted by paulina del rio from chile on Tuesday, April 07, 2009 08:23

My precious, beautiful son Garrett William Park took his life on October 18, 2008. It has been just 5 months yet it feels as if I am stuck in one horrible moment where my life is forever changed. He would have been 24 years old in a few days, March 29th. All I can think about is that he is not ever going to be here with me again. I won't get to hear his voice, hug him tight, drink in the sound of his laughter, or gaze into his big beautiful brown eyes that were as soft and sweet as a doe. Everything has changed. I am barely hanging on because my heart is so shattered that I physically hurts. I have to remind myself to breathe in and out because nothing comes natural any longer. My beautiful son is gone and my soul will long for him until I get to heaven one day and can hold him close and tell him how much I have missed him. I don't know why you did this Garrett. I desperately want to be able to talk to you and know you are okay... that you are happy, whole and perfect in the presence of your Savior and Lord Jesus Christ whom you gave your heart to when you were a young boy. I wish you had come to me... I wish you had thought about what this would do to everyone who loves you. You didn't leave a note.... nothing to help us understand. I beg God every day for the chance to go back and stop this from happening. I would give my life for you in a second. I would do anything I could to make things better for you so that you wouldn't have felt so hopeless and sad. I didn't know. None of us knew. Why? We are all left behind in the wake of this hellish pain amd sorrow to try to live without you. It is so unfair. Why didn't you think of what this would do to me as your mother? To Jennifer? She was planning to marry you and build a life together with you. Do you know how much you have devastated Austin and Crystalyn, Glenn and your grandparents? All of your friends, family and loved ones are so confused, so broken so lost. Why son? Why did you choose to take this way out? I have thought about doing the same thing so many times but I just can't add to the heartbreak of those who love us both. I want to be with you so much but I know that I have to wait until the Lord calls me home because it isn't my right to take my own life just as it wasn't really yours. I thank God so much for His forgiveness and mercy. He said that no one could snatch those who belong to Him out of His hand and that nothing could seperate us from His love. That proves to me that you are safely in His arms now. I know you must be sorry for what you did. I forgive you son. I love you with all I am and will ever be. My heart is shattered beyond description but my love for you is eternal.

Always and Forever,
Your loving and devoted Mom

Posted by Cheryl Evans from Orlando, Fla on Tuesday, March 24, 2009 07:27

On 30th October 2008, our son Andrew Wolfe age 27 decided to end his life. He will never realise that so many people cared about him his parents, brother, partner, 3children, friends and relatives. Every day we think of him. He wasnt perfect . We had a lot of hard struggles and days with Andrew. He was too bright, he was often bored. He loved his children with a passion. In the last week Andrew would have turned 28. If only we could turn back the clock. But we can''t. But we can still miss and love him.

Posted by LEANNE WOLFE from Bli Bli on Tuesday, March 03, 2009 17:15

This is for Richard Marsland - though I never met you, I feel like I have lost a close friend. Your death has affected me and so many others in such a big way, in a way I didn't think possible. It's been a month, yet at least once a day I still have the sick realisation that it is real, that it did happen. I feel it in my stomach and my heart - a heaviness and a cloud. I would give anything to bring you back, but I can't no matter how much I want to, and I have to accept that and try as hard as I can to learn form this and make something positive come out of it. I wish you knew how much you were and are still loved, how talented you were, how special you were. You have made my life a better place and I will never forget you and how you have made me feel (good feelings and bad). I just want so much to bring you back, but I can't, and it just burns me up inside. I just can't believe it still. Would anything have saved you? I guess we'll never know.

Posted by Bernadette from Brisbane on Monday, January 05, 2009 23:04

Dearest Laef, we will all miss you so much tomorrow. Christmas will never be the same without your gorgeous smile, your charisma and your jokes to entertain us. We love you, little brother and hope your beautiful smile will be shining down on us from wherever you are.

To Vern, I hope you're in a beautiful place, that the past few years have tamed those demons of yours and you're now happy and at peace. We all love and miss you very much.

xxx

Posted by Britt from Perth on Wednesday, December 24, 2008 12:05

My little sister Kelly took her own life in 1993. I was 18, she was 17.
You broke my heart,Kell. Even today I still struggle to keep it together. They tell me it's Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, but I know it is just a broken heart. I wish you could see my babies Kell. They would have loved you so much and I know you would have adored them too. I wish you were here, with your own babies. You would have made such a wonderful mum.
All the things we could have, would have done together.
I know the pain was too great. I know you couldn't take it any more. So much pain for so long.
But I would have fought for you, girl. I would have killed for you, died for you.
Why didn't you come to me?
Why didn't you send that letter?
I would have come for you. I would have gotten you away from it all.
Oh god, it still hurts.
15 years on- I'm still bleeding. I miss you so much, little sister.

Posted by Cathy from NSW on Sunday, December 21, 2008 01:31

william prior. age 60.......dad you where the strongest man i had ever meet, you where my best friend you where my very thing , i am so heart broken so lost .to think some one that i loved so much was so sad in there life. i never had a clue you where so sad, that day i got that phone call was the worst day of my life, i didnt believe it, i could never think that you would take your own life. i am so so so sad to think you put a gun to your head i just cant deal with that. it dont get any easyer your on my mind all the time, i miss you, it upsets me to think your grandson was born 4 days old he never got to met you.., its only been 8 months . but its been so hard to know that i will never see you hear your voice see your loving smiling face ,just to know your not there. im so lost and still in shock . i would never have thought that you would take your own life. to think how sad, lonely, and alone you must have felt breaks my heart,i never got to say good bye i never got to hug or kiss you .. i love you dad and miss you every day, ,,,,,, your loven daughter kylee....,

Posted by kylee prior from sydney on Monday, December 15, 2008 22:11

My beautiful and much loved brother Michael took his life in January 2008, after a long and brave struggle with melancholic depression, coupled with episodes of debilitating anxiety. He was a gentle and loving soul and proud father of four wonderful children and two grandchildren, who were the lights of his life. Michael loved singing, dancing, music, working hard, had a great sense of humour and lived with honesty and integrity. He tried so hard to find peace and to protect his loved ones from the fallout of his despair. We all know you didn't want to hurt us.....it just got too hard to stay. Miss you so much darling, love Cathi x

Posted by Cathi Healy from Adelaide, SA on Sunday, November 09, 2008 00:57

daddy , im not mad at you. i just want you to know that you were a great father. you taught me so much about life. im sad that your gone . william looks just like you. its been a year and a half but its seems like a century. i miss your smile =] and your chipped tooth. i love you daddy ... and i'll always be your babygirl

Posted by alex from west palm beach florida on Friday, November 07, 2008 15:37

My husband was the 39-year old police officer and military veteran mentioned above. He took his life on October 2, 2008. He took my life with him. Everyday without him is empty. I miss him so much.

To my friend, my confidante, my lover, my hero and my soulmate .... you have ALL my love, ALL my life. I'm sorry I it wasn't enough to take your pain away. Your wife forever, Lori

Posted by Lori from Calgary, Alberta, Canada on Friday, November 07, 2008 15:07

Jordan I miss you so much. Why did you leave us?

Posted by Ranay from US on Sunday, October 19, 2008 12:54

In memory of my life, my love, my best friend, Brad. I am so sorry I couldnt have done more....I miss you forever. Prost!

Posted by J from Saskatchewan on Saturday, October 18, 2008 14:27

We lost our joy, our son Scotty on Nov 1st 07......he was creative, beautiful, funny,talented,amazing,incredible along with a completely wonderful nature, he was too sensitive, too unable to cope with getting mad or being sad. He covered it all. He was a magnet to be around, people were drawn to him, he was the connector in our lives. We will never be the same.
We miss you, and hundreds of your family members and your wonderful friends are still mystified at your death. It wasn't supposed to be this way. But we have to take what we have learned about the sadness you suffered, and kept to yourself, and we have to educate.........so many of us think that depression looks like it does in the commercials.......it can look a whole lot different from that , too.

Posted by Mary Peters from Wildomar,Ca. 92595 on Saturday, October 18, 2008 09:30

I lost my oldest son Matt to suicide. He was only 19 when he hung himself.
Matt I love you and miss you everyday.
You were my hero and I don't believe you ever really knew that.
Love Your mom

Posted by Susan Oliver from Virginia on Friday, October 17, 2008 10:48

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal.

My beautiful, wonderful brother - a police officer and military vet, dead at 39 with a self inflicted gun shot to the head. Not a clue, ever! of him being suicidal. 700 - 750 people, CPS and past miliary and public at the funeral. Still cannot believe his smiling face will never come round no more.

Facebook Group ''In memory of Police Const. Ernest Wayne Perry'' Feb. 5/69 to Oct. 2/08

Slideshow Presentation with music. Please look and share in my past proud moments of him.

Posted by Connie from Saskatchewan on Thursday, October 16, 2008 19:42

My handsome cowboy shot himself dead at Opium Creek Station NT. My son was loved, liked and always evoked a smile. Che was so bright but found life a challenge - in such a hurry to grow up but when he got there he didn't like it?? I love you my son, I miss you and I want you back.
Cowboy Up Che - Miss you much. Mummy xxx (to infinity and beyond ...)
Che Darius Purcell 3/5/1980 - 30/7/2000

Posted by Judith Selby from Canowindra NSW on Friday, October 10, 2008 19:35

James Hilton Stuart
19/02/67 - 08/10/05
May the good Lord be with you
Down every road you roam
And may sunshine and happiness surrond you when your far from home
And may you grow to be proud
Dignified and true
Be courageous and be brave
And in my heart you'll always stay
Forever Young
May good fortune be with you
May your guiding light be strong
Build a stairway to heaven
with a prince or a vagabond
Forever Young
But whatever road you choose
I'm behind you, win or lose
Forever Young Forever Young Forever Young

May the God Lord hold you in the palm of his hand.

Hugs and kisses until we meet again,
Bundles of love Mum, Dad and Suz xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Buddy and Mimi xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Posted by Cathy Stuart from Sydney on Thursday, October 09, 2008 14:05

Daddy killed himself on February 9, 2007. The day before his 66th birthday. I was supposed to drive to New Mexico to meet him for lunch. I wish he would have come to lunch and let us have a good time together at least one last time. I miss you, Daddy.

Posted by Kristin from Arizona on Thursday, October 09, 2008 10:01

I lost my precious son, Robert, on June 15, 2005. He was tall and slim, handsome, clever and newly married. He had so much to live for but sadly he suffered with a terrible insidious illness called melancholic depression. I believe, in a moment of despair, he took his life to rid himself of the terrible pain. I know how much he loved us, as we did him, and I know how much he wanted to live. He told me that he knew I understood how painful it was for him, and that helps me enormously. I would find it so hard to bear if he had felt I hadn't understood his distress. But, oh, how much I want him back. I miss his smile and hugs, his love and his just being there. I grieve for him, and I grieve for the loss of his potential. He remains so close in my heart because I will always love and miss him so very very much. Love you, Robert!.

Posted by Glenda Dean from Sydney on Friday, October 03, 2008 17:19

Carol Cadbury
My wish list

1 I wish you would not be afraid to speak my loved ones name they lived

And were important and I need to hear their name.

2 If I cry or get emotional if we talk about my loved one I wish you knew that it isnt because you hurt me the fact that they have died has caused my tears. You have allowed me to cry and I thank you. Crying and emotional outbursts are healing.

3 I wish you wouldnt let my love die again by removing from your home his pictures or other remembrances.

4 I will have emotional highs and lows, ups and downs I wish you wouldnt think that if I had a good day my grief is all over, or that if I have a bad day I need psychiatric counseling.

5 Being a bereaved person is not contagious, so I wish you would stay away from me.

6 I wish that you knew all the crazy grief reactions that I am having are in fact very normal depression, anger, frustration, hopelessness and the questioning of values and beliefs are to be expected following a death.

7 I wish you wouldnt expect my grief to be over in six months. The first few years are going to be exceedingly traumatic for me. As with alcoholics I will never be cured or be formerly bereaved but forevermore be recovering from my bereavement.
8 I wish you would understand the physical reaction to grief. I may gain weight or lose weight sleep all the time or not at all, develop a host of illnesses and accident-prone all of which are related to grief.
9 My loved ones birthday, the anniversary of their death and the holidays are terrible times for me. I wish you could tell me that you are thinking about them on those days. And if I get quiet and withdrawn just know that im thinking about them and dont try to coerce me into being cheerful.
10 I wish you wouldnt offer to take me out for a drink or a party this is just a temporary crutch and only way I can get through this grief is to experience it. I have hurt before and I can heal.
11 I wish you would understood that grief changes people. I am not the same person I was before my beloved died and I will never be that person again. If you keep waiting for me to get back to my old self you will stay frustrated. I am a new creature with new thoughts, dreams, aspirations, values and beliefs. Please try to get to know the new me-maybe you will still like me

Posted by my wish list from sydney on Friday, October 03, 2008 13:35

BRENDEN JAMES WILCOX 23/05/84 to 30th/12/07

Let's dance in style, lets dance for a while
Heaven can wait we're only watching the skies
Hoping for the best but expecting the worst
Are you going to drop the bomb or not?

Let us die young or let us live forever
We don't have the power but we never say never
Sitting in a sandpit, life is a short trip
The music's for the sad men

Can you imagine when this race is won
Turn our golden faces into the sun
Praising our leaders we're getting in tune 47214321
The music's played by the mad men

Forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever, forever and ever
Forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever? Forever young

Some are like water, some are like the heat
Some are a melody and some are the beat
Sooner or later they all will be gone
why don't they stay young

It's so hard to get old without a cause
I don't want to perish like a fleeing horse
Youth's like diamonds in the sun
and diamonds are forever

So many adventures couldn't happen today
So many songs we forgot to play
So many dreams swinging out of the blue
We let them come true

Forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever, forever and ever
Forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever, forever and ever

Forever young, I want to be forever young
do you really want to live forever?

Posted by mum from sydney on Friday, October 03, 2008 06:02

I lost my brother Harry 7 years ago. Harry I hope your looking down and see us and know that we miss
you. I hope you have found peace up in heaven and I hope you are happy. I miss your visits and I miss visiting you in all the great places you have lived. I miss your pancakes and I miss having coffee with you. You were always busy working hard but you always had time for a coffee. I hope one day we all meet up in heaven, the only differents is that we will all be older and you still young. I hope you remember us, because we will never forget you and will always miss you. I hope you see my Harry and know that I had to have a little boy so I could name him after you so I could hear your name being said, Harry I miss you heaps things seem alot different now your not here. Love your sister Lee xxx

Posted by Lee Turner from Oatlands on Thursday, October 02, 2008 20:38

I lost my son Harry 7 years ago 13th july 2001 . Harry was 32 years old and i know when i listen to other people i was lucky to have him for 32 years but that dosnt make it any easier, even after 7 years it dosnt get any better just different, I wish i could have that last night over again but i cant ,so i just hope you are at peace and know how much we all love you . You will always be my only one. all my love mummy dearest

Posted by Harry Hardin Turner from Haberfield on Thursday, October 02, 2008 17:40

how do we cope without you.The family is broken.Nan is sick from it.Mum and dad are dying inside your brothers feel responible .How can we get any answers without you here.Everything is hard. Noone can move on.We are so hurt. Life is not right without you.Your brothers need you.We need your funy sense of humour with us to make us laugh again,to make life fun again.We just struggle with it where are you,talk to us let us know what it was,we dont get it there was nothing wrong in this family.you told me .I didn,t really think you would do it.I told you things always look better the next dayand how much we love you, we are here for you,such a close family I dont get it .We love you DAMIEN come back to us I think about you every day,the pain is so intense.Time doesnt heal nothing heals you dying not even 21.Aweek before your birthday party on christmas eve how sad.My angel has gone Our family is broken but we are slowly putting the pieces back together WE LOVE YOU FOREVER and ever

Posted by nelly carroll from bundeena on Thursday, October 02, 2008 14:56

I lost my 20 year old baby brother Peter Scott in 2003 to suicide.
You were such a beautiful soul, and every day I thank god for the 20 years that I had with you!
I believe that you must have been in so much pain to do what you did and now you are at peace...
I know you did what you had to do, and I remember that I was lucky enough to hug you and tell you that I loved you the last day that I saw you. You came to me for a reason, I know that now... and I want you to know that I dont blame myself anymore for leaving that day...
I have been lucky that you have come to me in my dreams and that we have talked and laughed.
There is not a day goes by that I dont think of you.
I love you and miss you little brother!!! I look forward to seeing you again one day! x x x
Lots of love your sister Lise x

Posted by Lisa Marsden from Dee Why on Thursday, October 02, 2008 11:16

hi brenden its mum its breaking our hearts not having you here i just want my phone to ring and hear whats for dinner or pick me up just anything i so much want to be able to ring you we dont know how to go on with our lives without you in it we dont know how to cope your suppose to be here only if you had come to us we could have helped you somehow im so sorry for what happened to you ill never forgive myself we are never going to have christmas again it just wont be the same anymore i just want to forget all thoses holidays easter christmas ill ever be able to buy you a easter egg again or make you a chocolate bag for christmas please help me cope im dying inside and we just dont know how we are goning handle the rest of our lives with out you if only i had been awake when you came home ill never forgive myself for that i know we had our fights and stuff but we really do love with all our hearts i have to go now i hope you read this all our love your mum and dad love you xxxxxxxxx

Posted by carol and garry mum and dad from sydney on Thursday, October 02, 2008 09:24

Our beautiful son Brenden
When motherhood called one day and blest us with a son we held you close we watched you walk and then we saw you run.
Days went quick and time went by and you became a man.
Perfection was not ours to keep and god he took your hand.
For heaven called the time had come with angels you will stand
LOVE DAD AND MUM

brenden james wilcox Memorial site
http://www.bebo.com/BrendenJamesW made by jo stanley

http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MyProfile=Y made by me his mum

Posted by carol and garry from sydney on Thursday, October 02, 2008 08:32

Lifeforce Memorial Wall

Post your message